shenanigans field style

i spent today out in tha field cleaning out my old room in preparation for my return. i'd parked out on the street, and it was dark by the time i was leaving. it was also raining.

the dude who lives two houses down is the world's biggest sticky beak. he knows everyone in the suburb's business. he's also a royal pain in the ass, and once forged everyone in the street's signature on a petition to get the lane way next to his house closed. when the council discovered that everyone else in the street was actually pissed about the closure, and hence his deception, they opened it back up again. hah! but i digress.

homeboy was standing out on his porch, in the dark, in the rain, watching me get into my car. as i pulled out onto the street, my headlights illuminated something on the road. it was a small rocking horse, obviously belonging to one of the neighbourhood kids. i drove around it, then pulled over to go and move it over to the gutter.

as i did this, mr neighbour yelled out "don't touch it! there's acid or something on it. it hurt my hands and i had to wash them!"

seriously. what the fuck? if i had asked questions i would've been stuck there all night standing in the rain talking to him, so i just said "ok thanks. bye" and ran back to my car. when i got home i called mum and told her to call the hazmat team, or ansto to dispose of the horse. she told me that she'd let me know if it had mutated into a live horse. we agreed that terrorists are responsible.